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curvyenglishchloe

Alwalton - PE2
7 reviews
•
3.410

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Age: 55-59

Gender: Female

Meets With: Men

Hair Color: Blonde

Eye Color: Blue

Nationality: British

Orientation: Bisexual

Bra Band Size: 38"

Bra Cup Size: D

Breast Enhancement: Natural

Reviews

7 TOTAL REVIEWS
3.4/10
AVERAGE RATING

Reviewed on

2/10

£65

George St • Incall

Photos inaccurate

Do not recommend

Communications

made by text to confirm the meeting, asked for a GFE as listed on her profile

Venue

an apartment on George St, empty condom wrapper to the side of the pillow and the bin at the end of the bed had a couple of used condoms and wipes in it

Looks

wearing a plain brown summer dress, her large arse which looked smaller in the pics

The Meet

pretty much the same, you could of been Brad Pitt and she would have barely noticed you were in the room such was her enthusiasm, she 'loves to be in charge', poor level of service, devoid of the slightest level of enthusiasm

Final Thoughts

Save your money lads and go elsewhere, you'll thank me

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1 comment

Reviewed on

2/10

£70 15m

George St • Incall

Photos inaccurate

Do not recommend

Communications

Always liked the idea of being with a proper milf and from the limited pics on her profile, I thought she would be a decent punt but nope, big mistake. Comms were generally ok, all arranged via txt agreed on 30mins. She was using a popular place on George St that I’m sure locals know where I’m on about but all downhill from there on

Venue

She was using a popular place on George St that I’m sure locals know where I’m on about

Looks

from the limited pics on her profile, I thought she would be a decent punt but nope, big mistake. she’s wearing normal clothes, she came back 5mins later wearing the exact same clothes and not stockings or heels, she sticks her fat arse in my face

The Meet

Met at the door and zero eye contact, Brad Pitt could have waked through the door and she would be none the wiser, very cold and robotic, she kept sniffling saying she has hay fever, or it could have been coke who knows. Agreed a 30minute via txt but she asked me how long I wanted when I got there, guess that was my que to cut it short and go for 15mins, but held out for the 30, £70 for the pleasure although she advetises £65 for 30mins on her page, like anyone carries £5 notes thesedays or perhaps I should have gave her 5 pound coins would have still been too much. Asked her if she could wear stockings and heels when I arranged the meet she said no problem, gets there and she’s wearing normal clothes, she told me to get undressed while she went to get changed, she came back 5mins later wearing the exact same clothes and not stockings or heels, probably away for a sniff for 5. Get told to get on the bed and looks like I’m lined up for a massage, not really what I was looking for but go with it, get this horrible stuff rubbed on me reminiscent of anti bac, looks like I got rubbed down with anti bac, horrible. 5mins of that and she tells me to turn over where my cock has zero chance of getting hard, on with the bag and she attempts to suck, waste of time more chance of getting hard over a pic of the queen than this crap I was dealing with here, she sticks her fat arse in my face and tries to reverse cowboy.... yeeeah don’t think so love. Finally got frustrated with the whole thing and told her to take the bag off and give me hand relief, she put some oil on my cock which felt good, ended up cumming thinking of something else.

Final Thoughts

In and out in 15 - avoid!!

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11 comments

Reviewed on

2/10

Met on

£90 1h

City Centre near Marshal College • Incall

Photos inaccurate

Do not recommend

Communications

No issues

Venue

the building was like Piccadilly Circus, people in and out and hanging about on the stairs.

Looks

Blonde (Rachel aka Jasper) - Big Tits, big arse, 4/10 face (no makeup) Red head (Horace) - Decent tits, skinny arse, 3/10 face (no makeup)

The Meet

I’d seen englishrachel’s profile a few times on the website and on the directory, the pictures at the time included big tits, a big arse (which I like but I know isn’t for some) and the milfy vibes were strong which I quite fancied. I’d seen no reviews on her so I TOFFT in this case. I organised the punt via text and was given the address with no issues. Arrived 5 minutes beforehand, texted and called Rachel with no success, eventual got in and the building was like Piccadilly Circus, people in and out and hanging about on the stairs. First warning sign. After climbing the stairs (two flights) I knocked on the door and the Green giant wearing a onesie answered. She is very tall and had made no effort whatsoever in her choice of seductive clothing, unless you’re into bedtime. Second warning. Yes, I should’ve walked, but the horn was strong and the beacons in my balls had been lit. So into the flat, paperwork handed over, shower had, she pissed about for 5/10 minutes and whilst I was drying myself she asked if I wanted to pay for a second girl to join. I said no. She said “tough she’ll join anyways”. Third warning but too late at this point to bail. So here I am lying on the bed with a blonde and a red head - not bad you may think, however it was like sharing a bed with Jasper and Horace from 101 Dalmatians.

Final Thoughts

Long review I know, but to summarise englishrachelxx is as much use as a chocolate teapot. AVOID

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6 comments

Reviewed on

8/10

1h

Incall

Accurate photos

Recommend

Would repeat

Communications

I saw Rachel a few weeks before LD2.

Looks

Her profile pictures are largely accurate though on reflection they look like they were cleverly angled to make her belly look somewhat smaller but I wouldn't say she's carrying a couple of spare tyres.

The Meet

Rachel was very friendly and cheery in person when we met at the door and she led me upstairs dressed only in a gown and a smile. After sorting out the paperwork for a 1 hour booking, off came he dressing gown revealing a great pair of boobs. With a bit of foreplay (DFK, mutual OWO, fingering) on went the bag and we did it in missionary, doggy and cowgirl before she took off the johnny and gave me a handjob to completion.

Final Thoughts

I had to wait longer for this meet because of the lockdown but it was worth the wait. I had a really good time with Rachel and hope to see her again some time.

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3 comments

Reviewed on

4/10

£65 20m

Hilltown • Incall

Accurate photos

Do not recommend

Communications

not the greatest, emailed on website to ask a couple of questions on what I like (nothing wild basic stuff) incase I wanted to book as in person I'm still a little shy. Bascially got a 1 word reply saying yes. Text the next day asking if she is free get a reply straight away saying yes and asking how long I'll be, says 15 mins. Get the postcode. Get there bang on 15min I text. Nothing. 10 mins later text again nothing. As it's Dundee and little other choices 1 last text. Finally gets door number.

Venue

crappy flat in Hilltown, first floor flat. Usual behind the door.

Looks

Defo the woman in photos but probably a few years old or the photos are touched up. Nice sized boobs, not amazing looking but good looking for her age, don't normally go for older woman but it's Dundee, beggeds can't be choosers as they say.

The Meet

Told to lie on the bed on stomach (I do what I'm told mostly) on with baby oil and a pretty rubbish massage for 2 mins a few rubs with her boobs and told to flip over, slips on bag barely hard and sucks for 2 mins, stops then reverse cow girl which was just awkward. I got to to give oral, wasn't the freshest, then told to stand up and got wanked off on to her tits. Out the door in 20 mins.

Final Thoughts

Asked about a shower in the text cos I was straight from work which she said was fine but wasn't offered and she wasn't fussed either.

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5 comments

Reviewed on

2/10

£100 37m

Dundee city Centre, old tenement style upper flat on a Main Street • Incall

Photos inaccurate

Do not recommend

Communications

Found myself in Dundee recently with unexpected time to kill after being mucked about at work. Tried a few of my”safe bets” across the central belt, but nothing doing... Had the horn after a few really shitty days so was getting desperate. Looked local around Dundee (I know, I know) and the only reply I got was from this SP. was very, very unsure but little brain took over and I thought, why the hell not, how bad could it be. 🤦

Venue

Location - Dundee city Centre, old tenement style upper flat on a Main Street but kinda discrete. Service on a clean enough bed but the place was grubby. Footsteps heard creeping about outside the door in the hallway.

Looks

She’s fat. Massive arse. Big swinging tits but not in a sexy way at all. Big gelatinous gut hanging over her twat. No idea how clean or trimmed that was as I never saw it Teeth: nasty. Think Luis Suarez with nicotine stains and gaps. 🤮 🤮

The Meet

Service - awful. I shoulda known better and should’ve walked as soon as the door opened and she wouldn’t show herself. Got almost dragged in to pitch blackness and shepherded in to the room. “Get undressed, lie on the bed, I’ll be back in a few minutes”, out she goes to stash the cash. She returns and I’m bollock naked lay on the bed (why I didn’t run whisky she was out I’ll never forgive myself for. Any how, in she comes: She’s fat. Massive arse. Big swinging tits but not in a sexy way at all. Big gelatinous gut hanging over her twat. No idea how clean or trimmed that was as I never saw it Teeth: nasty. Think Luis Suarez with nicotine stains and gaps. 🤮 🤮

So, I realize I’ve made a huge error here and ask for a massage to lessen the blow and kill time. Weird. It was like she was trying to start a fire with friction burns even with oil. Rubbed me with a frenzy and killed any notion of “this could get better”. Incessant questions about my job, where I live, family life ... 🤦 After about 15 minutes she slaps my arse “turn over”. I did, with trepidation. She does advertise OWO on her profile (and I’m an OWO guy) but she didn’t even offer, she had the bag already in hand ready pop it on.... I wouldn’t have taken it for all the tea in China, so OW received. Again rushed, toothy (🤪 🤱 ) and frantic. Was just trying to get me to come and fuck off. Being a true soldier I thought fuck it I’m at least going to fuck her so I can report on that. On to doggy so I didn’t have to look at those teeth - I instead got the sight of her massively wide arse. Managed about 30 seconds but the smell from *down there* was getting to me. What the fuck was I doing??? Stopped there and wanked off over her back. Done.

Final Thoughts

Cleaned up and got the fuck out of dodge.

Not sexy, not fun, not relaxing, and really unpleasant. Irony is, I think she’s not a nasty or malicious woman herself (she came across as cheery but a bit simple), but doesn’t have a clue about providing service. I was back in my car in 37minutes. I’m not giving her the negative for short-timing me, I couldn’t get out of there quick enough. AVOID.

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5 comments

Reviewed on

4/10

Met on

£100 45m

Dundee • Incall

Accurate photos

Do not recommend

Communications

In the interests of research and helping the community (someone had posted a request for info in the "regional punting" part of the forum - the long "Dundee" thread p123). I gave "englishwomanlycurves" a phone, early in the morning, looking for an early morning appointment. Initially wasn't going to post as the original profile disappeared, but subsequently saw the new one, so better to post and let folks know about the encounter. She offered an appointment about 1.5 hrs later which was acceptable due to me needing to drive there and that would take a little time (play away and all that). During the phone call no question as to how long I was wanting arose which was a little worrying as to the authenticity of the provider. (This turned out to be unfounded). So, postcode in hand I made my way to Dundee. Standard phone me when you get here. 10 or so, minutes before agreed time I fire of a text to let her know and within a few minutes had received the flat number.

Venue

clean flat

Looks

Not unlike her photos, so decided to go for an hour which meant that there would be no rushing and what I was seeing wasn’t off-putting.

The Meet

Made my way there and noticed a person slowly walking away from the doorway that I needed to be at. Few of things came to mind, either he was a punter leaving, the boyfriend vacating the flat for a short time or just plain bad luck. Luckily, he did not see me as there was a couple of ways into the flat courtyard and he was facing the opposite direction. Once he was gone I made my way to the door, which was unlocked and made my way up the stairs. Knocked on the door, which duly opened, standard standing behind door with housecoat on. Entered and directed to the bedroom. Not unlike her photos, so decided to go for an hour which meant that there would be no rushing and what I was seeing wasn’t off-putting. Her fee was 95 for the hour in that profile, (100 now), but I didn’t have any change so 100 handed over which was taken out of the room to, well, wherever it goes. As she left told me to get undressed. So far so good. She arrived back in with my change…something I wasn’t expecting and something that some other peeps do not always do, so a big plus point for her Took direction from her and got on my front for a massage, well a back rub. Round onto the back for the front massage. On with the condom for a blowie, which was ok, no major problems apart from the positioning, couldn’t reach her with my wandering hands. Bad point. She asked if I wanted her to go on top, but I opted for me on top, certainly for the first pop, so I duly hoped on-board. She had some nice gyrating action going on but didn’t want to slow it down even after being asked to. Yep I didn’t want to come too quick but she had other ideas. Bad point. Generally not much kissing going on, certainly not the deep full on stuff that is most enjoyable. Anyway I popped and she had the wet ones handy. Of to the toilet she went and I waited, on the bed, naked, for her return. On her return she sat far enough away that I would have needed a barge pole to touch her. Pleasant enough conversation but no touching obviously…this was an hour appointment and hadn’t even got half way thru. (even after all that trying no to pop too quick, lol.) Eventually offered me a further back rub which I accepted, finished with the back rub she made it obvious that time was up, not one for arguing and any hope, from me, that a second pop was going to happen as I was now getting bored with the shite, I got my kit on and left.

Final Thoughts

After the walk back to the car I checked the time, a wee bit of calculating from the last text to the time back at the car was 45mins…could have been worse I suppose. There was a few minutes walking time to/from car as its not always a good idea to park right outside the property IMO. If it was a half hour appointment would probably have given a positive, as everything I wanted was accomplished, but this was an hour, and was left slightly frustrated….So defo negative. The pleasant nature and the 5 quid change were both good points. After weighing up all aspects, including those not documented I have to go with erm….. Negative, yep negative, the 1 pop, Rush tactics and 45 mins car door to car door just don’t sit well with me. Meet took place beginning of February, 2018. Don’t really need to say this but I, most likely, won’t be back. (bladdy hell...that's some typing, long...too long)

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5 comments